Mahatma Gandhi once said, “Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”
The modern human faces the unique problem of “Sunday Neurosis” hardly felt by our ancestors. It’s that anxiety setting in as the weekend comes to an end on Sunday evening and the worries of the workweek ahead start shooting towards us.
Now that you are already on the way to mastering your Resistance, let us see how for a fraction of the effort you can work this anxiety out.
Losing Control
A modern human’s workweek, especially in corporate culture, is dominated by two themes:
Conformism: Following other humans to navigate life doing things like everyone else
Totalitarianism: Following commands of our employer to work in exchange for the money
This duo guides us through 5 days of the week just fine, but as soon as the weekend arrives, we find ourselves free. Most of this time is spent escaping ourselves, by indulging in activities like partying, binge-watching and over-drinking, but eventually, the existential vacuum catches us.
The problem with letting others control our lives for 5 days a week is that we have forgotten that we can control our lives. The Resistance felt against any attempt to guide our own course of life throws us into fear and anxiety, and we run for an escape or symptomatic treatments.
The Fall of Fulfilling Work
In the past, work meant doing something that connected with our being, challenged us, and intrigued our minds. Most people had the autonomy to attempt anything in life in the absence of the social expectations of an ideal job and salary.
As Industrial Revolution led to organized labor, more and more people were absorbed by companies asking for labor in exchange for money. This changed the relationship between people and work. This also led to the concept of weekdays and weekends, with most time spent pursuing something that people did not feel connected to and the remaining time spent recuperating and preparing for the next week. People were stuck in a loop!
The transactional work became just a means to an end, no more quenching the explorative and adventurous nature within people. We still have glimpses of higher goals, but we fall back to the usual ways of living from one weekend to another, hating our jobs yet never giving them up as they ensure stability.
And when the need for autonomy becomes irresistible, we face another form of Resistance. We look around and see everyone else living just like us. And we are coded to find comfort in conformism, so we surrender to Resistance. In the end, our lives become a struggle between what we do and what we dream to be. This, by Gandhi’s definition we saw earlier, is the opposite of happiness.
With these considerations, we can devise a solution.
Paving the Path
One way to live a fulfilling life is to commit to a meaningful project. It could include creation, experience, or transforming self in the face of suffering.
Here, as we face Resistance in the form of anxiety to control our lives, the solution is not to suppress or ignore it, but to face it head-on. You have to bring your thoughts and actions into harmony, and here are three broad domains to do so:
1. Create (Pet project, etc.):
Commit to a side project that you can work over one or multiple weekends
Do not chase perfection in the beginning. Keep the expectations low to get started and just work for enjoyment
This will not only give you a sense of accomplishment but also help you find an outlet for your curiosity and passion
2. Experience (Explore, etc.):
This regards the experiential meaning discussed by Frankl and is one of the easiest ways to feel whole
Read a book, go for a hike, or connect with people who share the same interests as you
3. Transform (Why?):
Connect with the “Why?” of your job or college course itself. In the bigger picture, what good changes are being set into motion by your effort
What aspects of your work resonate with your passions or curiosity?
At work, try to increase the time you spend on activities you like, or in hard times remember the “Why?” of your work
Feel free to use a single or combination of these activities over your weekends.
A Word of Caution
As you try activities, we suggest you do not pick up too many activities at once. You can still pick one activity from each domain, like creation, experience, and transformation, but avoid picking multiple things from a single domain.
Remember, the reason you are doing this is to bring harmony between your thoughts and actions. But picking up multiple activities will end up overwhelming you and defeat the purpose. You will end up under stress again as you feel like you are not able to juggle multiple balls.
Ideally, in the words of Joseph Campbell, you should try to pierce the center of your being. Find out what part of your being are you holding back. Either do it or kill it, but never leave something hanging. Indecisiveness and half-hearted effort will only cause suffering in the long run.