Earlier we saw how a deep breath can ground us in the moment and help us snap out of any storm of thoughts. But how are these storms created in the first place. Let us explore one of the common sources that many of us willingly welcome into our lives.

The World Happiness Report published over the years shows a striking trend. Negative feelings like worry, sadness, and anger have been on the rise. In fact, there was a rise of 27% in the 8 years from 2010 to 2018. And sadly, deep inside we all know there is no reason to doubt these figures because things just seem to be getting worse, from mass shootings, suicides, and mental disorders increasing all over the world.

Is it just a coincidence that this upward trend of negativity lies in the same period as the rise of communication technology, especially social media? The technology that has brought us closer to our distant loved ones can’t be so bad, right? Well, it isn’t a threat if we handle it well, but the story changes if it starts mastering us.

Bring the Kids Out

Before we go any further, a moment of silence for kids and animals, who are often pulled into experiments 😜 Here is a famous one.

In 1972, a group of Stanford University scientists conducted the Marshmallow Experiment. Out of a bunch of kids, each child was left alone in a room with a marshmallow on the table, with the promise that if they do not eat the marshmallow for a certain duration, they will be given two marshmallows.

At its core, the scientists wanted to study the impact of delayed gratification, how the choice of a child to pick a small reward immediately vs a bigger reward after some wait affected their lives. In the following years, as the kids got older, the scientists followed up to see how these kids were doing in life. Results showed that the kids who were disciplined to delay eating the marshmallow were more successful and happier, as compared to their impulsive peers.

Beings of Bias

Evolution has given us the gift (and curse) of bias. While mostly the term bias carries a negative annotation, in evolutionary terms it is just an inclination towards behaviors that increase the chances of our survival. Just imagine, thousands of years ago, if you were a tribal human in the jungle and there was something in a nearby bush, chances were that it was a tiger, and you were better off staying away. Now an optimist may argue that it could be a bunny as well, and we can’t deny the possibility, but would it be wise to risk your life in the name of optimism? Thus, to ensure survival, it got coded in our genes to give more weightage to the negatives.

We all have Negativity Bias, a tendency to give more importance to negative experiences than to positive and neutral experiences. The problem is that the modern world has turned our negativity bias upon ourselves.

Not necessarily evil, but companies need to be profitable to survive and grow. This means selling more to people, be it “cool” clothes, or a “miraculous” make-up product. And what better way to do it than telling people how their current state is not good, be it their fashion sense or skin color? This forms the foundation of marketing and advertisement, where we see influencers, usually actors or sportspersons, using a certain product and feel the urge to follow. Cannot see the negativity bias yet? Think again. No, you are not picking the negatives in the product, but instead looking at your own shortcomings. Thanks to the geniuses who made the ad!

The problem is so hard to see because you are surrounded by it since childhood, from criticism of teachers to failed expectations of loved ones. Now no need to get angry at society because we must accept that we oversimplified things in the explanation above but take it as a call to grow your awareness of negativity bias.

Want to see a real evil? Go no further than the social media behemoths like Facebook and TikTok! It is only by making you spend more time on the app that these companies can earn more from advertisers. So, they use mechanisms like Followers, Likes, and Views to get you hooked. As more uninformed youngsters join these implicit marketing platforms, we have a whole generation exposed to influencers, likes, and exotic locations. Nothing bad in dreaming or enjoying memes but if it comes at the cost of feeling bad about the income of your parents, or the face you are born with, it is time to rethink.

The Antidote to Scarcity

Where do the discipline of Marshmallow Experiment and our Negativity Bias meet? In both cases, whether in front of a marshmallow or an advertisement, there is a feeling of scarcity at play. When we feel that our current state is lacking something, we are compelled to leap where the grass appears greener, be it a sweet marshmallow or an expensive cosmetic.

Solution? The opposite of scarcity. Acknowledge abundance. Shift the focus from what you are lacking to what you already have. A better term for this is Gratitude, being thankful and appreciative of the goods in life. Start with the things you often take for granted, like being able to walk, breathe, or a loving family. These small things, that often go unacknowledged, will form an ocean of positivity for you, just because there are so many of them.